I found a way to make today even less fun than the last few days here, have a flare up of my asthma symptoms. I am still waiting to see a resident about going back on steroids (I've been off inhaled steroids since before getting pregnant with Reid) but luckily the respiratory techs could get me some un-expired ventilin. (The problem with having one's asthma under control is that you forget to keep your prescriptions up to date.) The drugs helped but they make me feel shaky and anxious, well more anxious really, so I spent most of the day in bed. I really don't need any extra complications right now, but at least being here I should be able to deal with them without too much effort. My nurses are great, offering me oxygen and checking my O2 sats regularly but I am not actually short of oxygen, it just feels like a massive effort to breathe.
I did get moved to a private room yesterday so at least I didn't have to worry about bothering anyone else when I had the asthma attack at 6 am. And no one disturbed me when I drifted back to sleep after feeling sorry for myself for most of the morning. I hate how whiny and miserable the asthma attacks make though. It seems like feeling sorry for myself is the biggest hazard to my mental health right now and when it's all you can do to just lay there and breathe, feeling sorry for yourself just comes naturally, ugh.
Sorry about the asthma! I don't have asthma - but I have watched my brother suffer with it, so I have a least a bit of an idea how awful it can be.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you have a private room. And honestly, feeling sorry for yourself is probably par for the course. Not that I want you to feel miserable and sad all day - not that at all - but what I mean is don't feel guilty that sometimes you do feel sad. No one should have to go through what you're going through.
That said, I hope the coming days are better. I hope you have enough visitors and some kind of entertainment to keep the "blues" at bay for a good chunk of the day, at least.
I'm rooting for you!